What’s that saying again? “Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” Expectations are things I always advise my friends not to have. Expectations have made me cry myself to sleep. They have made me question humanity and its potential to do harm. They have made me confused about life. They have made me numb at times. They have left me in a state, a state which I would never wish any one to be in.Setting benchmarks of the attitudes and behaviors we want others to uphold could be us setting ourselves up for disappointment. When we set expectations, we give others the potential power to control us . Whether or not they live up to these expectations potentially affects the way we view them and perhaps the way we view our relationships with them and also potentially the way we act towards them and others.
My mum always told me never to expect much of anyone, that anyone and everyone has the potential to do harm, not necessarily because they always do so intentionally but because of circumstances and primarily because people are human. She tells me how important it is to let people be who they truly are and that I need to respect the behaviors of others. But most importantly, she said that what I need to do is to personally decide which behaviors to keep and accept as a part of my life and that I need to do so silently. She said never to complicate life or over-think things and that the people who were meant to be a part of my life would naturally stick and also to never go chasing of people that don’t. What is yours is yours and can never be taken from you, she says.
I love all she said but I think am still struggling with the whole notion of not having expectations of people. Is it possible for me to call you a friend and have no expectations of you? As much as expectations have led to tears in the past, I still have them of those I am close to. I advise people not to have expectations of others, but the question is, Is it really possible for us not to have expectations of those close to us? Can we honestly say we have no expectations of anyone? Hmmm, something to ponder on….what are YOUR thoughts on this?
#SassyFunke