Lagos, Nigeria is a city of Love Love Love….I LIE. Lagos is not for the faint-hearted. This highly populated city will chew innocence out of you and you will look back reminiscing on how dumb you were. Dating in lagos takes skills, skills you better learn quick and hopefully not through experience. That quote about how experience is the best teacher doesn’t work here. Listening to other people’s experience is the best teacher. Learning from the mistakes of others is the best teacher. Here are my own tips to dating in Lagos:
TIP 1: Date silently
Just because you are dating doesn’t mean you need to announce it on a radio station. Are you to first to go on a date??
TIP 2: Date quietly
As much as Lagos has some really well known cool spots to hang out i.e. Maison Farenheit, Eko Hotel, Angel Villa….Please AVOID them all. Look for unknown new spots to explore. You don’t want to be bumping into everyone whilst you are trying to figure out whether this hottie is the real deal or not. You know how Lagosians spread rumours and thrive on GIST aka GOSSIP. Please avoid being on the first page.
TIP 3: Ask blunt/Straight-to-the-point questions on the 1st or 2nd Date (I prefer 1st)
Questions such as:
- Are you married or divorced?
- Do you have kids?
- Are you currently seeing anyone?
- Where are you in your life now when it comes to relationships?
You may disagree with me but you are setting yourself up for tears and “whys” if you don’t do yourself a favour and ask ALL the above. We all know that married men are out on the prowl as a norm so please be smart.
TIP 4: Clarify what dating is
Lagos is not the city to make assumptions (#MakeZeroAssumptions). I mean, some people date 10 people at once and see no big deal in doing so. Just enlighten yourself as to what you are getting yourself into.
TIP 5: Don’t be quick to fall in love
This tip is for the childish ones. What do you know about love? You meet him, he spends on you, flies you on a private jet, pays for your mother’s bill and suddenly you are in love. Abeg snap out of it. You might love all these things he does for you but is that love?
TIP 6: Options
Until you are in an exclusive relationship, you are a free agent. I hope you can hear me loud and clear, a FREE AGENT. #KeepYourOptionsOpen. Also keep this fact to yourself.
TIP 7: Live your life
Here I am telling you to not change your full schedule in anticiapation of this guy. Live your life full and proud. Don’t suddenly ditch all your plans to make room for him. Nothing is more attractive than a woman with her own life and vibe.
PLEASE share some tips that have helped or that have perhaps saved you from a lifetime of misery in your dating saga!!