A number of weeks ago, I was told that someone I knew (not someone I would necessarily call a friend) dedicated an afternoon to gossiping and making pretty ill jokes about me in the midst of a few of my friends. This is someone that shortly after, was all chatty and seemingly nice to me. To be honest, my first reaction was to definitely confront this individual (I am not one to shy off letting people know exactly how I feel) but what I did next is what I want to talk to YOU about.
I spent the weeks after doing absolutely nothing. I didn’t confront this individual. I smiled right back when this individual smiled at me in the hallway. My mum has always said to me that silence is healing. Silence really gives you time to see perspectives. It saves you from investing energy unnecessarily in areas that truly deserve none. It can set you free.
In deciding whether or not to remain silent, I asked myself the following?
- Is this individual a friend or an acquaintance?
- How much value will I get from confronting the issue?
- Can the confrontation time be invested in other areas that will generate greater substance?
- What was this individual contribution to my being?
After analyzing the answers to the questions (1. Acquaintance 2. Zero 3. Yes 4. Zero), I am truly thankful I had the common sense to say nothing.
This brings me to the real point of my post. In life, we will confronted with situations where we want to defend ourselves, to defend the ones we care about, to fight for our rights, to prove we can’t be trampled upon, to prove we are not weak…I am here to say that there is so much strength in silence, in refusing to be dragged in mud, in refusing to entertain certain nonsense, in refusing to stoop to a level below yours. Silence isn’t weakness; there is a beauty within it that unveils itself with time if you are patient enough. Essentially know those that deserve your words and those silence is better suited.
Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all || Unknown